Developmental and Line Editing Combo

This service offers developmental editing and line editing. I’ll look at story and craft but not spelling, grammar, or punctuation. Those are copyediting concerns and are NOT offered in this service.

Here are some of the issues I’ll flag:

-Characters are one-dimensional.
-The plot has holes or unresolved issues (and this wasn’t done intentionally to continue a series).
-As a whole, the story isn’t working. The plot is weak or there is no plot. Some of the plot elements feel contrived.
-The protagonist is too perfect and has no room for growth.
-The hero or heroine is flawed but doesn’t grow by the end of the story.
-The middle sags.
-The story doesn’t start at the right place.
-The scenes don’t have goals.
-The story lacks emotion.
-There isn’t enough conflict.
-The stakes aren’t clear.
-The pacing is too slow or too fast.
-We’re not deep enough in the character’s POV (point of view).
-The scenes are episodic.
-The story lacks substance.
-Minor characters take over.
-There are backstory and/or information dumps.
-Parts are told instead of shown.
-There are inconsistencies in the story.
-Some of the character reactions or actions aren’t realistic or don’t fit that character.
-The POV character doesn’t always think logically.
-The author intruded and talked to the reader.
-The author doesn’t stay in one POV long enough or slips back and forth within the same scene.
-We’re not grounded in the scene.
-The story doesn’t progress.
-The transitions between scenes are weak or nonexistent.
-There are issues with the implementation of deep POV.
-There’s bad choreography, and we can’t visualize what the character is doing, or what he’s doing is physically impossible.
-The author explains things to the reader instead of trusting she’ll understand.
-There’s poor execution of GMCs (goals, motivations, conflicts).
-There are talking heads.
-Words are repeated in close proximity to each other.
-The writing is passive instead of active.
-Adjectives and adverbs are used instead of stronger nouns and verbs.
-The writing needs to be tighter.
-Clichés are used.
-The same expression or phrase is used instead of keeping the writing fresh.
-The dialogue is buried in the narration.
-There are issues with the dialogue or action tags.

Basically, I’ll flag anything that isn’t working in the manuscript with the exception of spelling, grammar, and punctuation.

NOTE: This service is best for writers who have revised and polished their manuscript, preferably with the help of critique partners and/or beta readers because we can’t see the flaws in our own work. If you haven’t had another writer go through your manuscript and/or if you’re a new writer, you might benefit more from a manuscript evaluation report. Get the story and characters the way you want before you worry about craft issues and line edits.